Stinky demons possess gays? 7/25/14



The Demon Haunted World, by Carl Sagan, is an interesting read. Why do some still believe in such things?  Why did they ever?

I recently ran across a Facebook item that claims homosexuality is due to demonic possession, and that gay demons stink worse than any other kind. (to high heaven, one assumes). Upon reading this blog, I had a two-part epiphany.  This revelation allowed me to figure out when I became possessed.  I now know, to within a few months, when I became host to a gay demon.  It happened sometime in late 1974.

High school.  Specifically, Mt. Whitney High School in Visalia.  Gerald Ford had just become President, our space station was Skylab, computers were the size of small cars, and Visalia was a city of about 35,000.  Somewhere in my sophomore year, a gay demon set up residence in …  wherever it is demons seat themselves in human beings.

How do I know?  Well, according to the article I mentioned, it seems demons stink. Gay demons, apparently, stink the worst.  How a spiritual being can have an odor is not explained, but supposedly they can be quite aromatic.  Looking back, and armed with this new knowledge, it becomes clear that in 1974, right in the throes of puberty, my demon moved in.  I began experiencing a foul odor, of which nobody else was aware.

This random odor would appear, in my nose alone it seems, and man was it rank.  I’d shower frequently, scrubbing myself red in an attempt to eradicate what I assumed was gym, hormone, and teenage who-knows-what-else induced stink.  I even visited the school nurse to see if this was something I needed to see a doctor about.  She assured me that whatever it was, nobody else could smell it.  She probably thought I was a bit nuts.  She might have been right, but that’s another story, and another blog.

Although, with the knowledge provided by the author of that piece, I’ve now got a time and place for my possession, I still don’t know how it happened.  It had been at least 5 years since the cousins and I had played with the Ouija Board, so that’s unlikely to be the source.  By the time I was twelve I was an atheist, so this demon had to set up in a non-believer if he was going to move in.  Of course, some demon whisperers claim being an atheist is a sure-fire way to be possessed.  (I think they just don’t like it when we shred their arguments and demonstrate a better knowledge of their “holy books” than they do.  ”Demonizing” us is pretty darned convenient!)

The second, most revealing, part of my epiphany was the realization that I only suffered from this “aroma-that-only-I-smelled” when I was, first, in denial about my sexuality, and then, after I “came out” to myself, while I was in the closet to everyone else.  The odor would come and go, sometimes not making an appearance for months or years, only to suddenly return, with a vengeance.  Once I was completely out, the odor vanished, and it’s been almost 20 years since I’ve noticed “demon-smell”.  Apparently the demon only stinks when you try to deny him.

Another blog I wrote, Demons, Diabolical Lifestyles, and late middle age, tells of others who also claim demons inhabit homosexuals, and are responsible for our “diabolical lifestyles”.  The theme of that blog is how disappointed I am in my demon.  He’s been a real stick-in-the-mud, diabolically speaking.  No wild party life, no orgies, and no criminal record.  And since I haven’t smelled him in almost 20 years, I’m thinking he might have given up and left.  Oh well, he was a real slacker anyway.  If he’s gone, nobody, even me, is going to notice.

One of the downsides of the Internet is nonsense that used to be contained to fringe individuals or groups can now be seen by anyone with an Internet connection, anywhere, at any time.  They feed their demons (so to speak) with the world-wide-web’s plethora of unfiltered “information”, and spread their own special version right back out.  It reminds me of the old computer saying, “garbage in, garbage out”.  Some of these folks live in a demon-infested world, and what a terrible place that must be.  Children believe in monsters under the bed, or in the closet, but to never outgrow such fears would be a terrible way to live.  Only feeling safe with your imaginary friend to protect you, and, according to some of the more “out there” types, with that not always being enough if you’re not 100% vigilant, has got to wear thin on a person’s rationality.

According to these folks, I’ve got a demon inside.  If that’s true (and I don’t for a moment think it is… but), can I trade him out for something more interesting?  Retirement is on my horizon now, and I have a lot of making up for lost time to do!

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